he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
