Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Randomize
