worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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