you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
