Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize