are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
