The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
40s are totally the cure
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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