"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Randomize
