I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
