I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Randomize
