he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize