I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
