we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
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All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
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"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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