I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
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Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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