Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
