Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Fuck appropriateness.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
