I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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