Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I bet he comes in French.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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