Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Randomize
