do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
