Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize
