"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
