Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Randomize