I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize