for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Randomize
