Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize