ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
mondays should just be called national damage control day
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
