i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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