I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
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