i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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