Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
