ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
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