it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize