Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
