making cat noises will not fix the situation.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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