does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
