yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
