There is no way he is gay with that hair.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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