What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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