you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
