I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
