My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I just gargled with NyQuil
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
