Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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