I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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