I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
