i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
