Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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