dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
