Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Randomize