You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
So. Much. Porn.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
